This Functional Family

I've spent a lot of time this year reflecting and overthinking. That means I'll be posting more here.

Sure, I could pour my heart out to my family but I haven't spoken to them, like really spoken to them, for a long time. We're not a touchy feely family anyway. My father rarely spoke of his childhood. I heard about my grandfather and grandmother mostly from my aunt. My mother is not a talkative parent either, the longest we ever spoke to each other was 6 years back over a half an hour phone call. My sister, well, we stopped seeing eye to eye since we were both primary school. Cousins? We never hang out together apart from when we were little kids.

But not to say they're not any good. I've had all the support I needed all my life without any shortage. My parents were determined that I got the best I wanted even when it was not what they wanted for me. I'm grateful that family never stands in my way of anything. They know very well that trying to stop me from doing what I've set my heart and mind to is an exercise in futility. Neither would them ask me to do things I don't want to.

But all said, I do feel that I'm really on my own in this life. Myself is all that I have. In other words, I'm alone.

And it's starting to get really lonely..